As I continue to think about our self compassion journey this year in 2018, and what it means to really love ourselves, what keeps coming up is the idea that we teach people how to treat us and how to love us, through what we accept from them.
Every time we let someone blow through a personal boundary, every time we let another person talk to us with disregard for our humanity, every time we tell ourselves "Oh, it's not that big of a deal," or "It really doesn't matter," when it does matter, we are not loving ourselves.
And if we have children, we are not teaching them to love themselves either, because they are watching us to learn how to love themselves.
When we accept less than we deserve, we are teaching others that it's ok to disrespect our hearts, our boundaries, our bodies and our minds.
Where do you accept less than you deserve?
Is there any scenario where you give less than another deserves?
Think about a relationship in your life where you continually tell yourself that the way someone treats you "really isn't that big of a deal,"-- when your gut and heart tell you the opposite.
First, acknowledge to yourself how truly hurtful their behavior is to you, and that each time you accept hurtful words or actions, you are telling yourself subconsciously that you really don't deserve to be loved.
Then, let the person know that what they are doing is no longer working for you, and that you need their behavior to change --because you now understand that how you let people treat you is a direct reflection of how much you care about yourself.
And, you are working on loving yourself and taking good care of yourself more....
It's never too late to ask someone to start loving you differently.
If someone you care about frequently tells you that your behavior could be more thoughtful or accepting, consider showing them how much you love them by really changing how you interact with them, because if you really love someone, it's never too late to respond to their requests to love differently.
Wishing you a beautiful Valentine's Day!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Dr. Kim Sage